Are you successful? What actually is success? What does it take to succeed?
The first thing that comes to mind may be the "stuff". The beautiful, big house, high powered career, lots of money and perfect body. However science suggests that is isn't actually the "stuff" that makes is happy, and in fact, using these areas as benchmarks for success actually makes us less happy.
There is in fact a more significant factor that’s free and within your reach... believing in yourself.
Believing in yourself may be your most valuable resource, as it has a powerful impact on your behaviour, emotions and experiences. It is a mindset that motivates you in reaching your goals, it removes the invisible barriers that fear can use to hold you back, and it allows you to view your world without the filter of low self-belief.
You deserve to be happy and fulfilled, so how can you start increasing your faith in yourself?
Step 1
Mastering Confidence
When you’re feeling unsure, or overwhelmed, remind yourself that confidence is a skill you can develop. You might need to fake it sometimes, but gradually you’ll accept and trust yourself more.
Initial tips to begin building confidence are:
1. Review your achievements: It’s easy to forget how far you’ve come. Give yourself credit for your major accomplishments and the incremental progress you make each day.
2. Set goals: Keep adding to your track record by creating specific and compelling goals for the short and long term. Making an effort is just as important as the end results.
3. Change your inner dialogue: How do you talk to yourself? Choose words that lift you up and inspire you to try harder.
4.Continue learning: Maybe you need additional resources and qualifications to pursue your passions. Take courses online, read books, and talk with others about their areas of expertise.
5. Think positively: Cultivate an attitude of gratitude and hope. Start your day with a smile, and savour small pleasures. Instead of dwelling, what can you learn from mistakes or challenges?
Step 2
Taking Care of You
Your daily choices reflect how much you value yourself. You deserve to be looked after as much as anyone. Adopt habits that protect your physical and mental well-being, such as:
1. Exercise regularly: Physical activity reduces stress and increases hormones that help you to feel calm and happy.
2. Eat healthily: It’s easier to have confidence when your energy levels are high, and your blood sugar is stable. Enjoy a diet rich in nutritious whole foods, including plenty of vegetables, fruits, and whole grains. Avoid excess salt and sugar.
3. Sleep well: Your body and mind need 7 to 8 hours of restful sleep each night. Stick to a consistent bedtime and keep your bedroom dark and quiet.
4. Manage stress: How do you deal with daily tensions? Learn constructive coping strategies. In addition to working out, you could develop a daily self-care practice or listen to relaxing music.
Step 3
Reach out for Support
Believing in yourself also means being realistic. Relying on others can sometimes be a sign of wisdom and strength. Try these strategies:
1. Advocate for yourself: Mutually supportive relationships are based on healthy boundaries and asking for help when you need it. Communicate tactfully and directly and allow yourself to be vulnerable.
2. Network actively: Build a strong system of personal and professional contacts. Join clubs and go to places where you can meet others who share your interests. Nurture your relationships by staying in touch and being willing to communicate on a deeper level where you share your thoughts and feelings.
3. Find a mentor: Working with a trusted advisor is a great way to gain guidance and valuable feedback about your career path and other aspects of your life. Look for someone you can relate to and be respectful of their time. You can start with someone you know or ask your contacts for introductions.
4. Be generous: Giving to others can increase your regard for yourself in many ways. In addition to helping others, you’ll see proof that you have strengths that can make a positive impact on the world and your community, giving your own self-belief a boost in the process!
By believing in yourself and your abilities, loving yourself for who you are now (as opposed to who you want to be) you can create the satisfying life that is right for you and those you love.
Isn't that what we all want really?